True Life: I'm A Bitch.

I never realized how much of a bitch I was until this week. Everything irritates me. I have a snappy rebuttal for anything thrown my way. I desire to cut people the fuck up with my words. I think I used to be timid. I think I used to be afraid of confrontation. But now I exercise the right to reciprocate the emotional distress placed upon me by people who stupidly think I will not retaliate. But why? Why am I a bitch? And is it a bad thing?

I have so many friends that are almost disgustingly sweet, that have not a malicious bone in their size 2, doily-trimmed bodies. These are females who would never even consider slapping a guy, calling him a pussy, and snapping his phone in half. These are the females that would come to me, upset about their romantic circumstance and being continuously trampled over by inconsiderate guys, and rejoice like a retarded kid at a carnival as I regale them with verbal demolishment of said fellow. I am not so different from these girls. I can be, and usually am, sweet as a pea and cute as a button. But, I've learned, that my preferred method of "building a bridge and getting the fuck over it," is BITCHINESS. There is nothing quite like brazenly letting an ex-boyfriend know, not only that it's not cool to lead me on for months of my precious life, be a hypocrite and a liar (Break-up reasoning: "I don't want a girlfriend." Valentine's Day: new girlfriend), but also that he exhibits qualities of a closeted homosexual and has definitely done the reverse-Beyoncé ("Partna Partna Partna Let me downgrade U").

My ex-boyfriend pulls this shit, and then has the nerve to tell me that I'll "probably write a blog about it to try to solve my unhappiness or frustration," like "heroin." Heroin? Well, HERE IT IS, and thank your lucky gay stars it wasn't worse than this. Bitch KNOWS I'm the ghetto Asian Carrie Bradshaw. Deal with it. If writing is my drug, so be it. That goes for anyone who may be upset or displeased with what I'm writing. It's my opinion, and if it pertains to you, either accept or deflect.

Yes, I'm a bitch. I've never felt so bitchy. But at least this heroin-blog-fix helped me out with what really took a toll on me emotionally. I'd rather rant and rave via blog than have to pull a Jazmin Sullivan on someone's ass. Because believe me, I would (if only your ass had a car).